Five Questions with Nicole Witt
- 1. What are Adoption Consultants?
Let’s start with what Adoption Consultants are not. They are not facilitators. Facilitators find birth parents for their clients (the adoptive parents) and create the “match.” Adoption Consultants take a slightly different approach and work exclusively with adoptive parents. That’s not to say that they never hear about particular situations through the attorneys and agencies with whom they work but, in order to make things as safe as possible for the adoptive parents, a reputable Adoption Consultant will connect their client with the agency/attorney, not directly with a birth parent.
Adoption Consultants serve as an unbiased resource to pre-adoptive parents throughout the adoption process. Most pre-adoptive parents have just come from fertility treatment where, although difficult and confusing, they have had a medical team to recommend next steps and guide them through the process. When they begin to pursue adoption, they often feel overwhelmed, lost, and unsure where to begin. An Adoption Consultant fills that gap.
Adoption Consultants have the experience and contacts within the adoption industry to provide their clients with tons of information that the clients just don't have the time to gather on their own. Adoption Consultants provide the information, guidance and resources clients need to help them make the right decisions for themselves. Then, we create a customized roadmap for each client, guiding them to the right sources (agencies and attorneys) that work in the safest states, place babies the most quickly, and best meet the clients' unique needs. A reputable Adoption Consultant will have pre-screened all of the sources with whom they work, thereby creating a reputable network and taking the fear and uncertainty out of the process.
Most Adoption Consultants will work with their clients to develop their strongest Personal Profile possible. Then, depending on the clients' particular needs, they will connect their clients with more than one source, thereby increasing the visibility that the strong Personal Profile receives. This combination of efforts often pays off with a quick match - one of the key benefits of using a consultant. And, signing up with multiple sources doesn't need to deplete the clients' budget, as some Adoption Consultants will have negotiated with some of their sources to provide discounted (and perhaps even waived) upfront fees. That allows the client to gain increased visibility to potential birth mothers without spending additional money.
From there, an Adoption Consultant will prepare her clients for all of their adoption-related interactions - with home study providers, agencies, attorneys, and birth parents. The Adoption Consultant will also continue to advocate for her clients providing advice, offering risk assessments of particular birth mother situations, and even serving as a go-between for any issues that come up between the client and the agencies, attorneys, or birth parents. Often, this comes in the form of just lending a listening ear to all the questions and concerns that arise throughout the adoption journey.
- What are the determining factors in the advice you give your clients?
The guidance depends on the clients' individual needs. One of the most important factors is the laws of the state in which the clients live. If they live in a state in which the laws are very protective of adoptive parents, then it may be quickest, cheapest, and simplest for them to adopt within their home state. However, if their state is more protective of birth parents, then it likely makes sense for them to adopt from another state.
The uniqueness of each couple's background drives the development of their customized plan. For example, what the adoptive parents are open to in terms of race, medical background of the baby, and ongoing relationship with the birth parents impacts their personalized plan. Additionally, different strategies come into play for different religious backgrounds and for non-traditional adopters such as older couples, singles, or homosexuals. And, of course, the clients' timing and budget are also driving factors.
- Are Adoption Consulting services legal in every state?
Assuming that clients use an Adoption Consultant that offers educational services only (not facilitation services), then it is legal for them to educate themselves on their options and hire someone to guide them in their decision-making process. Facilitators represent a completely different set of services and are not legal in all states.
- What should someone look for in an Adoption Consultant?
It's important to find someone who has an extensive network within the industry so they can find their clients the sources that best fit their unique set of circumstances. It goes without saying that adoptive parents want to use someone reputable, so they should be sure to check references and the Better Business Bureau. Finally, they need to find someone with whom they "connect." Chances are, they'll be having many emotional and revealing conversations with their consultant, and they need to feel completely comfortable and completely supported every step of the way. Although some couples prefer to use a local consultant in order to have face-to-face meetings, the consultations can be just as effective via phone and email. And most follow-up contact will not be in person anyway. So it's important to not sacrifice quality for less important considerations.
- Why should someone use an Adoption Consultant?
Most important to many clients is that, by using an Adoption Consultant, they are often able to adopt much more quickly than they would have otherwise because of the increased visibility and the increased effectiveness of their profiles. Although they will pay a fee to their consultant, this can often be offset by the savings they receive via the discounted source fees that the consultant has negotiated.
Adoption Consultants also minimize the uncertainty, confusion, and frustration inherent in the process. They can not only help adoptive parents to feel more confident in their decisions, they can also give their clients peace of mind that they are working with only reputable sources who can fully justify their fees.
